The bed that I sleep in costs more than the blue book value of my vehicle. My husband says ‘you can’t put a price tag on peace of mind’. Our bed is one of those tempur-pedic beds with the adjustable base. He is a truck driver, and he is away a lot, so this is where I take his calls, homeschool our children and watch television. I rarely come out of our room. I’m not bragging, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2008.
‘Oh somebody done done me wrong
Now eyes to the ceiling all night long, all night long
Time is slipping away from me (away from me)‘
He dealt with a lot concerning this bed, then I go and ruined it by staying in it most of the day, everyday! And my husband is still with me, together 8 years, married 6 months! Through therapy, I learned the bed was for sleeping and sex, wish I had heard that before now.
Side bar…
My family and I took a road trip, a couple actually. We went to Panama City, Florida to see my parents and attended a Rutherford High School graduation. This was a bitter sweet moment for me as my own daughter had graduated from there the year 2010, and was assaulted the next day. She is doing well now and has trail blazed into her own growth. Thank goodness.
On the other hand, it was nice to see this young lady graduating, starting a new chapter in her life, after experiencing a category 5 hurricane in 2018, then all of the states shut down due to COVID-19 last year, luckily the mask mandates just removed after a little over a year in time for family and friends to show their support. At times, it was a little hard to focus on all that good when you are dealing with tragedy all around but it was time to smile and laugh again.
Almost immediately after, we road tripped again from what felt like summer heat, to winter cold in Baltimore, Maryland to visit my husband’s parents. I enjoy these trips, visiting family, seeing different scenery and discovering new places to eat. It is aggravating when everyone is asleep and no one to take good pictures while driving. I was able to capture this at a rest stop though.
When it is my turn to drive I have to be prepared as well as engaged so a BC Powder, Ginger ale, and the radio or some old CDs is a must while driving. I loaded up my CD player with a lot of old movie sound tracks and one of my favorites is LIFE, staring Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence. The track by K-Ci and JoJo of Jodeci entitled Life, came on, it didn’t trigger me, but the words belted out by JoJo “Somebody gave me life!” described the feelings I have about being diagnosed with fibromyalgia and the fact there is no known cure, is even close! I was definitely feeling this song and thought about how it reminds me of this terrible condition. I wanted to cry tears of joy because if fibromyalgia was a song, this would be it! But I had to see so that I could drive. Eye roll…
“Temperature’s like a hundred degrees, Like I got chains on me…Been robbed of my destiny”
Empaths feel it the worse
Yes, empaths take on a lot pain from others! I know so, I am an empath, which is the paranormal ability to experience feelings or emotions from that of another person. One can not know initially if what they are feeling is from someone else or their own personal experience at times.
I looked over some journal notes and ran across this entry:
One day I was hanging out with someone close to me, within an hour I felt like crying and couldn’t shake it. It was heavy but I couldn’t put it into words. Even after they went their own way and I went mine. The next day, they came to me in tears, saying nothing they do is right after all they do it feels like they shouldn’t put forth the effort and just like that, my heaviness was gone and I immediately went into healing mode for me and them.
That sadness was not my own! I was so glad but sad it belonged to them. But I recognized my power which is a blessing and a curse! A curse because I stay in my room all day and all night to avoid others’ and their pain. People all over are in lot of emotional pain and this causes us [empaths] physical and at times emotional pain, from head to toe… it gets on my nerves, literally! Usually when I see this person, I immediately burn sage or an incense and say a few affirmations. I am certain they do not mean to cause me any harm.🙄😆 🤣
A good diet, exercise and medication
I remember when I was first diagnosed I was sent to rehab I appreciated it although it was 50 pounds ago and just had my second child. So a bit more strain on me was added but so much less than before. There are a lot of changes that would have to be made for fibromyalgia to become less of an issue I agree, such as diet, possible career change and other lifestyle choices.
It is sad insurance will only pay for so much rehab but the intention is to use what you are taught while there for later, I guess. What helped tremendously, was the heated pool. So a spiritual bath is ideal.
Some don’t believe fibromyalgia a spiritual attack, just a disease that could be relieved with a good diet, exercise and medication 💊 🤔 they should also know that fibromyalgia is not made equal.
People are entitled to their beliefs, and as an empath I feel things from other people constantly and that causes flares as well. I try to keep to myself but that is how I became a hermit. Singing “Oh somebody done done me wrong, Now eyes to the ceiling all night long, all night long. Time is slipping away from me (away from me)“
Granted I get them either way, staying consistent with my diet, exercise, plenty of rest is key, I tend to meditate, not so much medicate. Sleep, definitely is a major factor. One has to opt into extreme measures to get this thing under control. And definitely have to develop the art of not giving a f#@%! Check negativity at the door and before leaving the house.
Somebody gave me life…
Remember the phrase, ‘ sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me’? However, some words can leave a traumatic foot print on your soul…
Trauma is a word that is used a lot these days. After surveying 100 people mostly women, men were included as well, that had been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, “trauma” is the common denominator for it’s ugly appearance.
Many experienced trauma in various ways such as their past relationships, childhood abuse, broken bones, accidents, domestic violence, etc. showing up in the present and affecting their future. Our bodies hold on to this trauma with memory cells and it manifests later in the nerves, affecting many mentally, physically and spiritually for most.
Mentally one believes that normalcy is over and the diagnosis is a life sentence, ending freedom. Eventually, other physical ailments appear like depression, anxiety, weight gain and pressure on the bones from lack of exercise or usual movement which fibromyalgia can be mistaken for at times. Fibromyalgia tends to only inflict pain or brain fog, along with neurological issues.
Spiritually, your belief system becomes questionable and words that have been spoken to you get heavy causing headaches, anger, frustration and loneliness – thus an attack in the spiritual realm. No voodoo doll needed.
Without being religious, you can reclaim back your joy! This is not one of those fibromyalgia can be cured, situations because I have yet to experience that. What I can say is ‘no one is you and that is your power’!
A spiritual attack, is real just like fibromyalgia, you miss many days of work, family functions and the fact that no one hardly understands your condition, however you may began to feel less impinged by changing the things you accept!
While chronic pain is debilitating and as someone who has been living with chronic pain, I understand and feel that shit about words spoken into my life that did hurt, which was a lie we were told as children. Some days, while in the midst of a flare I feel all the things people have said about me: lazy, not who I say I am, need a steady income, lose weight, etc. Instead of accepting ‘Oh somebody done done me wrong, Done me wrong (done me wrong), Now eyes to the ceiling all night long, all night long. Time is slipping away from me (away from me)‘. When I can I just get busy doing things so I won’t hear the voices, or find something funny to watch while passing the time during a flare.
The best thing to do is shut down the negative thoughts as they come up in your head or in person. It is really important to stay covered and put up spiritual wards (prayer, smudging sage, oil, incense, etc.) however flares can make you forget to, at least for me. Prepare in advance by placing things close by or hang affirmations close to you at all times around areas you are in.
I want nothing more than to be cured. It seems we are in this fight to come out with a way to help others. Many are called, chosen are few, huh? As a Black woman who has Baptist roots, reading the bible was always the answer to all problems. Though I’m not religious today, I did think about that story how Jacob wrestled with the Creator physically and spiritually, being left with a limp. I believe this diagnosis is a spiritual attack, if there was cure, it would not be. Many are spiritually attacked by being told by their physician they will have this condition for the rest of their life, “So tell me, how did I get life? “
One would probably say I need to go back to church to be healed, allow hands to be laid on me, but there are so many in the church dealing with as many dis-eases, especially fibromyalgia, so do they not believe? Indeterminately, I can’t subscribe to that belief. Even if there is no cure there certainly is a way to lift this pain to gain some relief. I work towards this each day the best way I can mind, body and soul. Nothing yet, but I won’t give up, while walking with this slight limp. Why would I go back when I can lay hands on myself?
I became a Certified Reiki Master Teacher for various reasons, initially it was for my children as it is great for them but then it dawned on me, why not treat those with fibromyalgia? I like to see others healed and if I can help others to heal their pasts, present and send positive inner-G to their future and heal myself and family in the process that is a win-win!
Reiki is an alternative medicine performed by sending life force energy transferred from the practitioner to the patient in person or via distance; made public by Japanese healers.
We need doctors who have the most extreme case of this dis-ease to get us some real help!!! Because I feel there is 0 empathy from the medical side. Nevertheless, it’s definitely something! I said ‘you get on my nerves’ to others my whole life! Talk about speaking things into existence and spiritual attacks, I may have been the original author of this onslaught against myself and need to walk it all back, because, sticks and stones hurt as well as words. I want to laugh when others say they want to die a quick death because that feeling is so real, just last night my husband asked what could he do for me and I responded ‘take me outside and shoot me!’
To some it all up, turn all those words into positive affirmations, set up spiritual wards that you can use daily, get some reiki in your life (if not me, someone) and purchase my journal to keep a record of reflections good and bad to make changes to your life, so that you may look back and see how far you have come.
Until next time, sending positive inner-G
Click on the book to access option to buy
Check out the video below for Life by K-C and JoJo
Something Nubian 
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